Day # 58 -- More on Postponement Character

I haven´t writing within these days and I feel very bad 'cause I have accepted self-sabotage with thoughts and back-chats of postponing this due to the excuse that I haven´t had enough time to do this writtings.
'I am tired at the end of my day' and I don´t reach to do all the things I have to do.

Ok, I am going to walk these points here.


FEAR DIMENSION:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within the system of fear of the future; feeling fear of not being able to do this and to let my mind to win this and I fail within my commitment of walking this Journey to Life blogs.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within the fear of not having enough time within my day to complete this point of writing my blog at the end of the day or at the beginning of it.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being let aside and to be delayed within this journey in comparison to others.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be fearful about the events and situations that I don´t complete in time cause I know that is an abuse towards me and others I realise, see and understand I use deliberately this as an abuse towards myself - instead of stopping me as fears, emotions and feelings and stand as self-stability and self-trust and self-security to stop my deliberate creations as abuse within my mind.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be fearful about if I don´t change others and me can suffer or something.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be able to stand efficiently and be let aside and pushed by my mind so I cannot stand again from this any more - within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that it will be more difficult in the future to stand from this points and others if I don´t walk them in the moment.

I see realise and understand that all my fears are mind programming within myself and has nothing to do with reality and my physical journey.
I see realise and understand that I accept and allow self-sabotage due to giving value and importance to the mind and it systems so that´s why I follow and create excuses - giving the mind the 'authority' to guide me within my life and all I do within my day.
I see realise and understand I create excuses to not face myself and to continue evading situations and points within myself and so creating more dimensions as the mind - as I realised in previous blogs - accumulating dimensions and dimensions.

I commit myself to walk within the moment the self-correction and so standing and walking through my MCS so I can stop this deliberate abuse as time loops.

When and as I see myself participating in fears in relation to not being able to come here and write my blog I stop, I breathe and I stand from this system in Moving myself to do things in the physical. I mean not postponing things and so creating more 'mind-background' to allow more abuse.

I commit myself to stop myself as finding excuses to not being able to come and write and so also in not having time.

When and as I see myself participating in fears of the consequences in the future I stop, I breathe and I Stabilize myself here as the Presence of me and as common sense. I am here, walking and standing.


"essentially - we're all walking this together within different positions/locations in existence and process - Marduk explained in one of his interviews the different positionings/locations of each one in existence and so one's point to walk in process for self and for all - thus, don't look at it as first or last, but each one taking/standing their point to walk in relation to where all are in their process in existence" - Sunette Spies

THOUGHT DIMENSION

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see me within the world - within this position I am in the journey to life as let aside and not being able to be at the same stage/location as others - I realise see and understand that I am participating within the comparison system.
I see, realise and understand the stupidity of these cause I am here within this moment and in seeing me as first of last is an abuse and yes, an 'stupidity'
In this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge me always based in comparisons and giving importance to the image/thought in my mind that others are more aware/developed as me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see me as less developed and aware and others because I have been I have not came here to write in the last days to due giving my power away to the mind and finding excuses to postpone this task/this commitment I do to myself

I commit myself to stop me as thoughts and to Embrace all of them to investigate and apply the self-forgiveness accordingly and so assisting and supporting myself to walk this Journey to Life.

I see, realise and understand also that in complicating all in my mind and over-analysing everything I tend to stop myself as making a pause due to this pattern of listening to the mind and so I postpone things

So, When and as I see myself letting my thoughts to influence me from Standing as a Practical Living Example to Myself - I stop, I breathe and I Stabilize myself here as the Presence of me.
I jump of my bed, I walk, I stand from the chair, I cuddle my cats or my dogs - I breathe - and I stand as me here and I do the things I Enjoy doing.


I see Here that is so easy for me as my mind to control me and to remove me from the things I enjoy doing cause I give more importance to postponment, to tiredness, to the programs inside me.

I stop, and I commit myself to continue walking!!

IMAGINATION DIMENSION

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in imaginations as me doing something else that don´t imply a hugh resistance within myself as the mind for example watching a movie, laying in my bed, seeing in the internet the things I want to see.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in my mind as imagination where I see myself writing my blog, or knitting or cleaning the house - as If I am walking it in the real time and so feeling a nastiness and a where I participate in negative and positive emotions and feelings to validate and feed that imagination episode and so sabotaging myself and letting my mind to kind of saving me from moving myself and so believing that I can do it in other moment.
Here; I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in self-interest cause I give more importance to ME as my mind and not to the things that are here to complete and to walk to do What is Best for All.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to first in my imagination walk ME in mind episodes as a way of analize and consider the amount of resistance and physical movement I have to take and so - letting Me as the mind to convince me that is Better to wait and to let things for another moment so I can Stay there as Postponement and so feed my MCS.

When and as I see myself going to my imagination Dimension - I breathe, I stop myself and I move myself in the Physical - jumping or walking and standing to move me here in the physical so I can see that those systems are real in the moment I let them to move me as the physical and in the physical reality.

I realise, see and understand that in that moments/time that I am busy participating and giving space to the thought in my mind and this making me go to the imagination process stage I could be Standing and Moving and taking the tools to complete and Do something in my Physical Reality - like taking my computer; moving my hands to write and to post my blog/like taking my hook and began crocheting/or to take the broom and the mop to clean.

I commit myself to Stop me as the Imagination Dimension - to Stop me since the fear dimension - since the Beginning So I can Move myself and Walk here as the Physical, with my Physical to Assist and Support me

"I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place

WANT, DESIRE as ENERGY before

RESPONSIBILITY as LIVING within me and my world" --Sunette Spies

@Journey to life.

BACK-CHAT DIMENSION

"Oh, I don´t have time to do this right now", "I´m tired; I do a lot of things", "I do it tomorrow", "nothing happens if I let this for tomorrow"


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to come into this stage as the back-chat dimension within and as myself and to create the back-chat: "OH!, I don´t have enough time to do this right now" and so I go into the excuses and justification background where I try to convince myself that this is true, that I deserve a moment for resting and so, I can let things for tomorrow.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create me as the Postponement Character since the first dimension as fear, then the thought, imagination come here to feed my mind and to participate in energy - so entertaining me as mind with energy instead of standing since the first moment as Breath within and as myself and so moving physically and taking my computer and placing my hands in the way I can type and write my blog.

I forgive myself that I haven´t accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand that for me is more easy to build mind dimensions as stories - as fantasies, illusions - so Energy!!! than moving myself in the Physical to do the things I have to do and so stopping me from making excuses and justifications -- creating since this another Character that is the 'Victimization Character'

I see, realise and understand with this the domino effect that i create since Giving Away My Power to the mind - that is the creation of more Characters and more dimensions.

When and as I see myself participating in the Mind-Creator-of-Characters when I am in deliberate action designing more Monsters/Demons within and as the belief that I am this - and so I am the assistance of my mind - like the workers within this World System that deliberately are creating more abuse and making the system huge instead of Stopping and Realising we can Stop and we can Stand since the First Moment.

I´ll continue with the next dimensions


For Further Support Read:

Character Dimensions – IMAGINATION Dimension (Part 2): DAY 166


Character Dimensions – BACKCHAT Dimension (Part 3): DAY 169

Day # 47 -- Moving Slowly

I have been noticing like doing things very slow - yesterday I was cleaning  my house as I usually do and I began observing me; my physical movements very slow I wanted to move more quickly but I couldn´t - well, I didn´t fight against this. I am was working also with tthis 'pace' I have - I use to move myself quickly - I walk quickly, I do things in a rush - due to my impatience, my body get tight and sometimes - due to this rush, I let things fall, I distract and well, I sometimes don´t remember where I put things and sometimes I have catched myself for example - keeping the bread on the refrigerator and the milk in the cupboard - LOL!

And as I say I have been observing me in slow motion and I get angry/intolerant with and towards myself 'cause I want to move faster and do things faster.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel that I will not have time within and as my day to finish the things I have to do, due to participating in the mind imagining myself at the end of the day with nothing of my tasks and 'thinks I have to do'completed in time and  besides all having a 'time for myself'  to rest and is when I participate in back-chats as 'uff, I am not going to finish this in time', 'it´s a lot of work' and so establishing a physical consequence such as excitement, worry, desperation, I start sweating and I distract myself as the mind and I don´t do anything as the consequence I allow and create by thinking and creating all these time-loops and dimensions in my mind.

Instead of being here as the Physical and as the breath doing all the things I have to do in the 'presence of myself as myself here. 

Breath is the Pace of Life and within and as that Pace I am and I move myself and I get done what it has to be done.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in fears of loss - believing that I am going to lose things if I move slower than my mind and If I am here as the breath of life, imagining myself moving slow and not completing anything of the things I have to do and so feel pressured and overwhelmed participating in back-chats such as ¡Faster,faster; move faster, Jessie move faster! and so abusing my body making it moving faster, and so due to this my hands get tight and heavy and for example I can´type efficiently because I am running inside me and the consequence is creating more time-loops, indeed more time as the mind and yes, what I 'loose' is opportunities to stand as the breath and the presence of myself here as life - because all my attention and power I give it to the mind to direct me and to control me.

Instead of me being here within and as the physical; Aware of every movement/moment I am in the presence of the Physical body.

So, Whenever I see myself going to the mind as thoughts, emotions, feelings, perceptions, images  when doing a task, walking, cleaning, typing, reading - I stop, I breathe immediately and accordingly I place myself here as the presence of me as the physical and I become aware of me as everything that is here - all the material things are here as me - so I embrace them and I move me as them - at  the same 'pace'/rhythm.  

I realise, see and understand that me as my mind is moving erratically and so abusing the presence of myself here. The mind makes me participate in the illusion of time and within this in the fear of loss. Time does not exist within and as me.

So, if time doesn´t exist I am here to enjoy the presence of me and the presence of everything and everyone as myself within and as my life.

So, I realise, see and understand that everything within myself as life has a pace and has a space -  for example within over -sleeping I am abusing the pace of life there cause I am not taking in consideration that time for another activities I have to do - is abuse 'cause I am keeping and stealing ,,,,,

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to over-sleep due to feeling and thinking that I am loosing something that is 'mine' - I realise see and understand over-doing things is self-interest - I am exaggerating, I am abusing substance.

Everything  has a space/pace within and as myself.
So, I commit myself to investigate more this and to make a schedule also to place myself as the presence of myself within and as my day and so being me as the directive Principle and not the mind in illusions, perceptions, and ideas, thoughts.

...this will continue...

Day # 46 -- Ignoring life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to  react upon a photograph and comments that was shared in Facebook by a woman commenting and being disrespectful with animals such as dogs; wanting to adopt a brand dog instead of a dog rescued from the street saying that they were dirty and ugly, sharing the Facebook image and feeling angry against this person, going to her profile and participating in back-chats such as 'She is the ugly one' ; joining this with more feelings and emotions against her.
Instead of stopping as reactions within and as myself in the moment and so not sharing this image to create more chaos and polemic.
I realise, see and understand how I didn´t stand in the moment and I am still directed by emotions, feelings, thoughts, ideas and perceptions.

I realise, see and Understand I reacted upon her the same way she reacted/defined the dogs in adoption. 
I am the same as her - I am not a difference. 

When and  as I see myself seeing an image and reading a comment on Facebook, either it is as I define as Negative or Positive - I stop, I Breathe and I stand in the moment, in the Breath clear as  and within myself to stop the abuse here as myself instead of sharing/spreading the 'abuse-bugs' within and as others as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react against people words, behaviours and patterns that are not the same as me - I realise this is based in self-interest and as ego´s from the mind - wanting and desiring others to think/act/be like me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the back-chat 'If the people were like me the world would be a better place, because I am not as others' - I realise, see and understand my self-interest there and how I feed it when I am infront people that are  not agree with me.

I commit myself to expose my self-interest/egos from the mind and so stopping them accordingly with the Writing, Self-Forgiveness and corrective applications in the moment when this situations occurs again until it not happens again within and as myself so I can stay and stand clear from all of this separations I have created here.

When and as I see myself reacting upon others wanting to impose my point of view that are just knowledge and information - I stop, I breathe; I bring myself back here to the physical, where I am standing infront of the other person with humbleness, communicating with him/her with self-honesty, - not trying to CON-vince but assisting them and sharing my realizations I have walked here in my process - so I and everyone can stand free and so, establish on earth a better space/world/environment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define situations, people, words, images, etc under the polarities such as 'Negative/Positive'. I realise, see and understand that those concepts are of the mind - is not what Life is. Life is not a polarity. I see that mind defines everything and from there my systems come and I define my life according to that information.

When and as I see myself seeing/approaching my life, my environment, other people in base of a mind-concept such as polarities - I stop, I stand as self-honesty and I bring myself back here in humbleness and I communicate with me and others based in the Presence of the Physical - based on the physical - being here as me as others - Because I see, realise and understand that I am others, others are me, we are reflections of the same self. We are one and equal.

I see, realise and understand that id everything is me here, Why I am fearful? Why I participate in self-interest? Why I am afraid of others if they are me?.

So, I see, realise and understand that If I react -  if there´s a moment inside me based on energy is because I haven´t investigated that point within myself - so, I am still one and equal to that separation.

So; I commit myself to follow investigating and unfolding characters/personalities/systems - exposing them here to set me free of that abuse the mind creates in the reality - in here.

I commit myself to show others and to assist others and ME to observe and see that the Mind is the thing inside us that creates madness in the physical as the reality. The mind as us is the one transforming our lives in a show, in a cartoon, in a character, in a side....in food for the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel ashamed by not realising this yesterday - Or I better say not being self-Honest to Stand and Stop all this chaos within me and within others by my decision... so, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ignore the common sense/self-honesty due to preferring to feed the energy/ego that I believe I am, wanting to make myself visible within all the situation as to also attract the attention to me and my words - Instead of considering others and the abuse I was going to produce with my self as the cells, atoms, etc in my physical body and within others out there - innocent people and beings 'that receives all the trash we produce' as the mind. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ignore self-direction/self-honesty within myself just to 'play around' taking things as a game and not realising, seeing and understanding the consequences are real, and I am living them

When and as I see myself infront of an option that is not for What is best for all - I Stop, I breathe, I discern within and as myself taking in consideration everyone as me here to take that step.
I see, realise and understand we cannot follow ignoring life/common sense within ourselves because the consequences are showing out there and life is suffering, life as common sense , as self-honesty, as self-direction, as consideration is ceasing to exist here.

Related articles

• Day#38 -- The 'ashamed' Character
• Day # 44 - My Intolerant Character towards certain people
• Day#35 -- My Character as an Animal Rescuer. How I create alter-egos
• Day# 40 - My character of 'Cat Fanatic'