Day # 16 Anger Possessed

I felt very angry today, I was very desperate and I wanted to hit something and shout. I began to be possessed by this anger. I was feeling very rare and I began to do my self-forgiveness here at in my room. 
I began Breathing and slowly but surely I took control and I directed myself to stop that possession. i was very surprised - I wanted to sleep or lay in my bed to calm myself but I realized I always do the same - to wait and  don´t facing myself in that moment.
I took my notebook and I started writing - my hands was very tense and I also felt a little pain in them; when I finished my SF my hands were less tense and I stop that energetic reaction I was having.
I saw Everything as myself and I moved myself to start my day breathing. 


I´ll share here the SF I did.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel anger.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in this anger.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in this energetic experience called anger and desperation.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be, and to participate in anger and desperation.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel anger and desperation because I feel I can´t do what I want.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel locked, limited and angry with me and with everyone else in this world.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the systems as desperation and anger to guide me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel angry and desperate towards my mother.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect anger and desperation when I hear my mom talking to me and asking me something.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in anger and desperation when I hear my mom talking.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the desire of explode myself and wanting to eliminate myself from my life due to the feeling of desperation and anger I am feeling towards me in this moment.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think I can´t do it.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in thoughts of not being able to do anything and I prefer not doing anything.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am one and equal to desperation and anger


I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to be the directive principle within my life and when I began to feel that energy inside me correct myself with breathing and not let those systems move me from here due to those feelings, emotions, thoughts.
I breathe and I bring back here and I follow walking and standing without giving my direction away .


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let the systems within me move me from what I really am. Who I am? I am Simplicity, I am constant, I am self-direction, I am clarity.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see in what I have become and what I have done and feel anger towards myself for what I am.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel desperation inside me.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe in what I feel and think it is real.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am one and equal to my mind systems and that´t why I let them direct me.


Till here no Further!
I stop this abuse


I realize I am not my mind systems. I can stop them taking Self-direction and Standing as the Directive Principle. I am my Self-direction en each moment of every Breath, of every word and in every physical movement.
The only movement I experiment/have is in Oneness and equality within me/with myself. - not of energy.


I Breathe. I direct myself here


I see what Is here
I see what I have Created
I see and Face everything that is here as me Stopping Fears in Every breath.


I see and Face everything and everyone as One and Equal to me
I see and Face my Reality in Simplicity and I move myself to be my Directive Principle


I let go the Control
I stop the desperation. I don´t need it to hide and protect myself from facing what I am and what I have done.
I am not my mind


I see my Reality
I see and face what I am
I see and Face what I am to Correct it in every Moment of every Breath.


I am the Directive Principle
I move myself in the physical to correct me in the moment.

Day 15 --- Ego; I unlock myself

Writing all days has been a great tool for me. I have been observing more spaces where I 
didn´t wanted to see in my past writtings.
I am surprised every day with the things I discover of myself and well, another point I was not observing clearly is my egos...I still have them, and I participated within them when I take a pause within my process.
Ok, I´ll start  my SF cause is the best way to expose everything.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suppress my egos by feeling ashamed of them.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be ashamed of my egos so, instead of facing them I suppress them in the deepest of me - like hiding them under the rug.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be ashamed of my egos and that´s why I don´t want to expose them.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel ashamed of exposing me here.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in a mechanism of protection and defence and not realizing this is a form of supporting ego.
I forgive myself that I haven´t accepted and realized that in defending and protecting me from others I am participating in Mind egos - I forgive myself that I  have accepted and allowed myself to present myself as hard and tough towards myself and others without realizing I was the  personification of my egos.
I forgive myself that I have not accepted and realized that fearing to be harmed by others is another face of my egos.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a personality that is strong and though to protect me and hide my insecurities - so, another face of my ego.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel superior due to the knowledge and information I have gathered trough all this years, information that is not very common between the people I know so I used and use this information to criticize others in my mind.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abuse life - me and others - through using Knowledge and information to make me feel superior to others.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to back-chat about others using the information I have gathered and placing me as better than others in my mind and in my 'facade' = fake-presentation of myself.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to build a fake presentation of myself to pretend I am strong like others and so, with me building a fake presentation participating in my fears of not being 'good enough' and also weak.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel weak.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in weakness.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as weak.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to build this personality to hide the real me. I forgive myself that I  have accepted and allowed myself to fear presenting to others the real me cause I perceive I will be harmed and abused.


I forgive myself that I haven´t realized that this is making me feel unworthy of sharing with others - so, taking me to Isolation - instead of letting all control and egos and share with others as myself as One and Equal to life.


I forgive myself that I haven´t accepted and allowed myself as One and Equal to others - I am one and equal to everyone here and there´s no need to protect me, there is no need to keep myself locked inside myself.


I commit myself to use the Self-Honesty, Self-forgiveness, self-corrective applications as a Key to un-lock what I Really am. Stopping all fears of being Me - stopping all justifications and excuses within me and letting Go the control I have placed over me.


I commit myself to expose my back-chats in every breath and to equalize me as one and equal to others, to life and stopping my participation within Egos.
I realize there is no need to protect me and still participating in my mind cause the Reality is not what I have perceived and feel.


I stop following my emotions, thoughts, feelings and I Place myself here as One and equal to Life.
I accept myself. I give myself the opportunity to be here.




Helpful links:
God Created Ego -- day 15


Reptilians- The Road Ahead part # 2

Day # 14 Head and Body Aches - Being My own cell keeper

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe the systems within me are more than me and that I am unable to stop them; to take direction of myself.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe, think and feel I am my Mind consciousness systems.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel overwhelmed by my feelings, thoughts, emotions, back-chats and thus think and feel that I can´t control them so I prefer giving up and let them to direct me and control me.
I forgive myself that I haven´t accepted and allowed myself to be my Self-direction.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I need another, a mechanism, a tool; something outside of myself to guide me because I don´t know how to do it.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let the systems programmed in myself  guide me; because I feel not 'powerful' to do that on my own.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed in myself resistances and opportunities to hide and wash my hands from facing myself and moving myself, directing myself to free myself from the mind systems.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist facing myself and using tiredness as an excuse to do something to stand.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use tiredness as  a justification and as a shell to not face me and my reality and so doing something to change it.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe taking direction over me is very difficult and I can´t do it.


I forgive myself that I  have accepted and allowed myself to think that I am helpless.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe anyone, and also me
 can´t do anything to change me so I prefer giving up infront of my MCS and accept the consequences  at my death than doing it in every breath.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to prefer facing the consequences - 'later' - or giving up to the inevitable instead of assisting myself in every breath; instead of standing and be my own Directive Principle.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see in death a better way to save me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think I am not good enough to be saved and thus I prefer giving up now and face the consequences than taking the Power to Direct me in every breath.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I prefer suffering than stopping that abuse in myself now - implicating that I don´t want to face my reality and so work on my self to be my directive principle within my life.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in tiredness and to define myself with tiredness - giving my power away to this system and believing is better than me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that tiredness exists within and as me.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deliberately abuse myself within the acceptance and allowance of death in every breath. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed separation within myself due to thinking, wanting, desiring and looking death as an 'easy-way/back-door' to escape from my Responsability  and from myself - and the best way to correct myself.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that death is the better way for me to correct me and to free myself cause I can´t in this moment so I prefer giving me away to the Systems of my mind.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed abuse within myself.
I forgive myself that I haven´t realized  that I am my own executioner - killing/eliminating me myself before others do - accepting and allowing failure, anticipating  to the worst because I believe that way I can suffer less or I can anticipate to other enemies so that they can´t find a way to harm me  - which is an illusion cause no-one is here attacking me but me.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that others/my reality is against me so I an anticipate to the worst, to the failure by eliminating me first, by infringing harm to myself before others can do it.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I open myself I can be vulnerable to the attacks that are out there.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that the enemy is around and I have to cover all the parts of myself so in that way I can prevent any damage. I forgive myself that I have not realized that I am my own enemy and that I am allowing separation and abuse by protecting me from something that is not real- so suppressing myself in every moment instead of letting go all the control and the fears to live and to Breathe for once and for all and to Live in Simplicity,


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in this masochistic mechanism to hide/protect me from what I think can harm me - so I prefer harming me first to anticipate suffering.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in masochism. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe I need suffering to correct myself.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to infringe suffering towards me to feel safe and to feel protected.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to play the role of a prison ´s warden so I can feel safe and protected.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be cold and hard with myself to lock myself as a way of feeling safe and protected.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to act as a warden - hard, inexpressive, tough - against  myself to avoid falling apart.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel weak and that´s why I have to create another personality to hide from others/from myself , to protect me from others/from myself  and thus creating a personality that is suppressing me.


I forgive myself that I haven´t allowed myself to realize that I am defining my reality - everything around me as a place where I have to be safe  - so I have to be hard in my 'facade'/ be hard to myself to feel secure and to protect what I am, thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be hard and though with others to avoid any damage.








I commit myself to investigate this further within myself - to investigate why I do this to myself.


Everytime I see myself allowing abuse and harm within me through words and  thoughts, feelings and emotions. I stop, I breathe, I stop my mind and I embrace myself as one and equal to life. I accept myself and I stop all abuse within  me and towards me.
When and I as see myself participating in feelings of not being good enough and feeling I am unable to stand, I stop, I Stand and I clear myself breathing and I continue moving in my physical with any participating within my mind. Stopping all participation with my mind. 


I take the Control as the Directive Principle. I stand as self-direction and Self-responsability.


I allow myself to let go the control. I allow myself to Stand as self-acceptance, stopping that protection and defence mechanism within me and I breathe, I relax, I express myself as one and equal to  others. I stop all fear and Insecurities.

Day 13 -- Family and Old Times

I go out today; my mother went to change the oil of her car and I take her in my car while the service were finished.

I wake up and I felt a resistance to do it - I was getting ready; changing my clothes and all and I started to resist and feel I didn´t wanted to go.

I noticed I began to feel angry and I start my Self-Forgiveness on my way to pick my mom. 

I clear myself and I bring myself back here. I promised myself to apply this without justifications and waiting until I come here to write.

Then, we arrived home and I started to eat. My neighbours usually  have visits  - they have 2 children - and I hear all the movement they have when they do gatherings and parties. 

When I hear them I feel 'melancholy'  for my past. I remember when we had our house full of people. We had seasons when many uncles and nephews from the united states visited us and stayed at home for many days.

I enjoyed that. I enjoyed hearing people, noises in the morning and while I was sleeping.

Now is different. My mom and me are the only ones here at house and many of my uncles are now dead so we don´t receive many visits; now we go to visit family but not as often as before ( also due to my pets is very difficult to receive friends) and not with the same 'quality' as before.

We keep in touch with the my uncles and nephews my grandmother used to visit more, but many times the environment is not honest and I 'feel' that and I feel very uncomfortable.  Some times is easy to 'read' people and some others not -- I have been stopping that and stop all those thoughts and back-chats but then I can have physical reference of that 'thoughts'.

Well, as I was saying that pattern open again today when hearing the noises back there - in my neighbour´s house - while I was eating. I was eating alone, my mother was in her room and I wanted to be there, in my past, and I felt sad. My memories go slowly but surely while the old people I enjoyed go away for ever. I feel a part of me goes to. ¿My past really happened?  Living here is like the past didn´t happened cause I am not bringing that past here and just walking and breathing here.

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I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel sad when remembering my past and perceiving it as better than my present.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the emotion of melancholy; remembering my past and desiring to bring my past back here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive my past as better than the present; thus I forgive myself to experience myself as better in my past; allowing to exist in constant separation an abuse towards myself cause I am divided in my mind; being in constant participation in my past experiences and memories instead of being here in the totality of self.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to divide myself in multiple layers - to exist in multiple dimensions and also personalities within myself instead of being here in every breath I take.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel sad to see other families having their homes full of people,  thinking in my past and participate in emotions, feelings, memories, images, even sounds separating myself from my reality and from  myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed separations within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare my life with the life of others - I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to underestimate myself and my life participating in comparisons and in feelings, emotions, pictures, images, and also underestimating my life and feeling it less than others cause I am not surrounded with people.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel myself happy when I am surrounded by people and sad when I am alone.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that happiness exists.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that happiness exists only in my mind and so, outside of myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define happiness with being sorrounded by people.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect happiness with memories from the past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define happiness with having my house with relatives as it was in my past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect happiness with an image in my mind of my relatives gathered in my house every weekend.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect happiness within memories of my past, thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect sadness with my present.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to underestimate my present because It doesn´t compares to my past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define happiness outside and separate from me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be happy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to 'try' to find happiness somewhere 'out there'  separate from me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to find happiness within my mind as memories instead of investigating why I can live it here as me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to care for my own happiness; allowing separation within me and with others as myself here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that my past had more 'quality'.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in separation and dishonesties, and abuse towards others as myself within also comparing the people that is here with the people of my past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deliberately live in an illusion, instead of being here in my reality, embracing all that is here as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define and connect my past with quality and thus perceiving my present as without quality; thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that life is defined by quality, so defined by characteristics programmed in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define life with my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see life through the eyes of my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold unto memories, past experiences and people that has gone already instead of living and being here in every breath, stopping my participation within the mind.

I forgive myself that I haven´t accepted and allowed me and all the people that is here as me  for what they really are, but instead I have been imposing my past unto my reality; so I am not realizing and observing I am in constant separation and surviving in an illusion.

I stop all Illusions here. I Embrace them all and I stop them within myself. 

I stop all judgements, comparisions and perceptions.

When and I as see myself entering/participating within my mind in bringing back memories, pictures, images, thoughts, feelings and emotions of my past, I breathe; I stop and I Bring Myself back here to enjoy my reality and enjoy myself and others as myself here, stopping the search of happiness in other places that are not here as myself. 

Stopping the necessity and desires of participating in the past to experience a false perception of happiness. 

When and I as see myself participating in emotions, feelings, memories, thoughts of my past when I see or hear people having reunions in their house. I stop, I breathe, I bring myself back here within my breath and I realize I am the expression of happiness and joy here and i don´t need anything to give me this expression separated from me.

I am here, I enjoy everything and everyone as myself here. I am the expression of happiness within and as Oneness and Equality.

I realise and I accept myself as the expression of joy of like within and as Oneness and equality; it is me as who I am. In other words the expression of joy is not laughter, smiling and jumping, being energetic.

The Joy is the Presence of me As who I am  of life within and as onenes and equality - constant, stable, presence, here in every breath.

I realise all Expressions of Life are not searched are Lived. 

I realize all expressions of Life are not originated from something outside of myself.

I realize all the expressions of life are not generated by outer sources.

They are Here as me within Oneness and equality.

Day 12 # Indifference and Coldness

I am focusing in my sleeping pattern and I am pushing myself to stand and to investigate myself within this behaviour and get out of this deliberates wastes of time/ breaths I accept in my reality.
Today was other day of moving myself out of my bed and I began to be very cold against myself cause I again over-sleep for 2 hours. 
I began to do my activities without thinking to much in this but I was disappointed and all my day were observing me as serious and indifferent towards myself. 
While I was knitting I began breathing and stopping those judgements against myself.
I really want to quit doing this - is like a drug, is this substance that makes me 'die' for many hours to evade myself.
I set my clock at night and the thought that pop - up related to the hour was 'Is very early, What I am going to do so early? I prefer waking up more late when the sun is up' 
I observe that thought and I really believe it. I stopped and I went to sleep. 
Indeed I wake up more late - when according to myself is an hour when I can make more things.
My Internet connection has been failing in the mornings so when I wake up early I want to get in and I am not able to connect me; so I used that as a justification --> 'there´s not Internet at that time, what I am going to do?


I am very careful also this doesn´t become an obsession, cause I usually get obsessed when I want things and I participate in this behaviour until I complete or until I get what I want.


So I stopped, I breathe and I start to do my activities. Directing myself to stop this resistances and tiredness within me. 


I forgive  myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in indifference towards myself.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use indifference as a punishment towards myself; accepting disappointment and feelings of not being able to.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within apathy through my day because I can get what I want.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel apathetic, indifferent and angry when I don´t get what I want; specially something that is going to benefit me within my process.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel with my 'battery-low' cause I was not able to correct myself within this point of my sleep-patterns.
I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that this is a process and breath by breath I am going to change and not rushing and anticipating so participating in systems like energy, desires and needs and anger and disappointment.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think to much in getting things done instead of walking here; breath, by breath; enjoying my process and not being in control all the time.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be in constant control over me - meassuring all my movements, words, thoughts, feelings and emotions -. instead of walk this process in Simplicity. enjoying every breath I take and enjoying the correction in every breath.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that I am doing something wrong because I cannot change.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to push myself to reach the image I have in my head  of myself without this behaviour.




I stop correcting myself since the Starting Point of Energy, control and abuse to myself. 
I realize I am putting many con-centration in my process and also I am allowing abuse within this. 
I am not enjoying myself walking this process and it shows every time I rush and I force myself to change immediately.
I realize this is a process and I am here walking and self.correcting me in every breath and this takes time.


When and as I see myself rushing and forcing me within this process to attain something since the starting point of a desire and need. I stop, I breathe; I clear myself here and I observe the abuse within this so I breathe and I start from 0 within Simplicity walking within my reality and enjoying my process and enjoying also my self-correction and self-forgiveness.
I don´t take anything personal and I stop all critics to myself. I breathe and I start again correcting myself and enjoying me as everything that is here.
Every time I see myself participating in desperation and in anger I stop; I breathe and I bring myself back here and in Simplicity walk and work with was is here; not taking this so seriously and continue in the next moment; in the next breath here as life, Embracing me! Accepting me.


I commit myself to enjoy process and to live it as something Natural within me, as an expression of myself.
Simple as a breath. Breath by Breath I walk.


Yes, I realize now!
I am in constant control; concentrating in how I have to do my process and that´s why I keep participating in this energy-movements inside me.


I promised myself to not be so hard on myself and Walk this process as a breath, slow myself and in Simplicity participate within my reality.
And because is a process this takes time and dedication and I am here, I am doing it so, I stop punishments towards myself and treat me with that coldness and not trusting myself.

Day # 11 --- More on Sleep-patterns

I am working on this pattern again and stopping resistances and desires to Give up.
I am waking up early: not 6 hours yet, I over sleep 1 hour. I have 3 days waking up early and starting my day directing myself within the feelings of sleepiness and tiredness.
Today I felt more tired and heavy and I slept a 'siesta'. I began to feel I was not doing the best thing and also a bit of disappointed. My day didn´t 'count' because I sleep that hour in the afternoon. I did a pause on the things I had to do and I feel like I failed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel that this day didn´t count because I fell sleep in the afternoon.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel disappointed because I feel I can´t correct myself in this point.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe I am not going to 'win' within this pattern I follow repeating.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to consider this correction as a competition; where one of us - my mind or me - is going to loose or is going to win.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in mind-polarities and I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed to realize that what I resist; persists.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in control.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I only sleep 6 hours I need to sleep a little more in the afternoon to feel rested.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to remember past-experiences when I worked and I wake up very early and I had to take a nap in the afternoon to feel rested.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in past experiences in my mind - accessing in to memories to have a reference, instead of being here and walk in my reality and not in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel I am not doing things correctly.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to also participate in desires and needs within correcting this point.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine myself - to have future projections - sleeping only 6 hours. Instead of walking here in simplicity without participating in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel unable to wake up after 6  hours of sleep.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as a sleepy person.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that me and this pattern are the same so I can´t correct it.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in tiredness.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to charge this pattern with a negative and a positive value.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see myself as wrong due to having this pattern; and also participating and creating the other polarity that is being right and play within polarities all the time.


I am also investigating in myself when my body is for real tired and need to rest and when is my mind.
I have been asking myself if I know when my body requires to rest separately from the mind and I can´t say 100% the difference yet!


I stop participating in feelings of disappointment. I stop my beliefs and thought around this pattern.
I Commit myself to walk this correction in Simplicity, stopping rush and regrets and control over me. I walk this breath by breath until this is done.
When I see myself participating in thoughts and beliefs I stop, I breathe, I clear myself and I in every breath take the opportunity to start from 0 without any record/image/thoughts/memories in my mind so I can be clear to walk in  and as simplicity.


I am here, I am constant, I am able to correct myself in every Breath.

Day 10 --- Sadness about Forest burning

Five days ago the biggest Forest in my city began burning - the reports say that this were intentional, induced by people that has nothing else to do or by people that want to make houses there.
All the city is sad because of this and we are very worried cause this forest like all say here is the more important provider of Air for ourselves. 
Each year is the same problem but only 7 years ago occurred a case similar to this one; but now  the people that are helping are not controlling the fire effectively, violence against the people that are inside the forest assisting is taking place.


I live near the forest - not very very close to it - I cannot say in km. how much distance is but I can see the smoke in the skies and the hills covered by this black and grey atmosphere, and also I can smell the air with smoke. Is very sad. 
I have been stopping my thoughts and feelings about this situation but into my mind comes images of animals dying and people without doing nothing. Also I have been participating in anger cause we are allowing this situation.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in sadness and in worries around the situation of the fire in the woods.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel anger around this situation.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel impotence around this and thinking that I cannot doing anything but to wait a 'miracle' or 'someone' bigger than me to resolve it.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in desperation and desires of not wanting to see this any more - wanting to scape to another planet, place, or dimension.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel sad and desires to shout and take every person as myself and correct them or eliminate them from the planet.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine myself big as an superheroe and going there to blow out the flames, taking all the animals away from humans to another place.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire having power to take away all the animals off the planet to another planet or dimension where any human can harm them.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel guilty when I see all the things I have while others don´t have anything.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think I am equal to the system and that i can´t do anything to change the world.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire the end of the world in 2012  were true and eliminate ourselves from the earth - leaving earth alone and peaceful.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive others as the problem; not realizing I am also participating in that and not giving any practical-solution in fact.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed in myself guilt because I see anything changing  so I think I am not doing my best.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to blame others for what is happening instead of realizing this is a consequence of all of what we have accepted and allowed in ourselves and in others.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel sad and angry saying that I didn´t wanted to born here and so  see all the suffering that we as me are causing.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up many times due to seeing all the insanity and suffering exists out there.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to scape and turn my face around when I see or hear some one telling about animal suffering.


I stop participating in mind consciousness systems and in desires and needs of evading reality when things go wrong and ugly.
When and as I observe myself participating in mind-chats/thoughts/desires/needs/wanting to cease to exist and go or block myself, close my eyes I stop. I breathe, I realize this is not the Solution - and I realize I am taking the 'easy -way' instead of placing me here as one and equal to all that is here and do something.


Doing Something is applying Self-forgiveness in every shade, in every point that is causing Inequalities and suffering and stop it within me.


So I breathe and I clear myself and I observe me as participant to and within an opportunity to make a change- so I give thanks to be here and to know this tools and I apply them and I speak, expose, stand for the ones that cannot talk, expose and stand.


I commit myself to Stand and walk within the path of Doing what is best for all; eliminating within me all the causes that are producing and feeding consequence outside of me. 


I commit myself to stop  my feelings, emotions, thoughts to start moving myself in the physical and assist to change my inner world, the inner world of others as myself and so, the outer world, the entire world.


I commit myself to stop giving up and to thank every breath I take as an opportunity to make a change and not allow any other things that are not What is Best for all.

Day # 9 -- Distractions

I have been working on this point of distracting very much as a way to divert myself from Reality.
I am this personality since ..always--Lol. The point is not giving much attention to my reality and give more importance to my dreams and imaginations ( imagination is the next point I am going to open and share).
I perceived my life so Boring and I moved myself to my mind cause there is where all the 'diversion' was( diversión in Spanish is 'fun/enterteinment', funny that in english is to divert)  so there, I invented worlds and realities better than here...better personalities and personas 


With Desteni tools I have been realizing all this is because I wanted to hide and evade to take control and Responsability about myself, so Instead of facing myself I preferred to procrastinate that - let it pass for another moment - due to the discomfort this made when I realized I was indeed lying to myself. 
So, since I began process I have been taking this in consideration so since then I have been observing myself and correcting that pattern within me ... 
But I still go to that 'chamber' unconsciously - when I enter to that program haha; well, situation... of having to pay attention and stop all me inside of me to control myself and hear, my mind/me starts talking so I hear middle of the message. I can observe when I was not here in a situation although I beLIEve I was when time pass by and I don´t remember what the other people say or asked me; so I have to ask again...


For example when my mom ask me to go to the shop to buy several things and I hear all - I believe I am indeed here and that I am paying attention - and then I start my way to go to the shop; when I arrive to the shop, I remember just the half of the things she asked me. LOL. So, I observe I was not here at the moment when my mother was talking to me...so I have to start from 0 again. LOL is funny...but it has been a process to correct it and within these days has been more easy.


The feelings I have when my mother or other person is asking me something/a favour is nervousness, anxiety and anger; cause in some situations my mother ask me things when I have more things to do, so, is frustrating to me that she doesn´t ask me of talk to me in a better moment. This makes me get very stressed, and due to my 'background' I also judge myself and think I can´t do it. 


And well, this 'distractions' are also an assistance to follow practising until this is done. And I have been focusing more and not using my mind to remember or to pay attention; but me as one and equal with everything here and breathing to not rush in my mind and also not anticipating.






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I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use distractions as a justification to not face my reality and myself here.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself and accept myself as distracted to abdicate responsability and be 'considerated' by others, for not being repressed or having a confrontation and hide myself from that - having Responsability and compromise.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe and think that people and me were going to 'minimize,' a mistake just by saying that I was a distractive person.
I forgive that i have accepted and allowed myself to play myself as a victim of the circumstances by using distraction as a justification.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am one and equal to the system and so, I am my mind and I can´t do nothing about it.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate responsabilities hiding myself in my mind, so diverting myself from what Is here.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create other worlds and personalities to hide myself from facing me here.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive my reality as boring, as not good enough as a cause for me to create a mind-reality to feel better about myself.


I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed me and my self as life here and all I have here as one and equal to me.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to categorize my life as not enough and playing within mind-polarities as good/bad, fun/boring, sad/happy.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go and escape into my mind when I am feeling threatened.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my mind as a place where I can be/scape when I see myself moved from what I want to do/think/feel.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to  participate within anxiety and desperation when 
my mom is asking me a favour or is communicating with me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed in myself desperation and anger while my mother is communicating with me about a point to consider for the best of the two of us. 
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within competition when my mom asks me to do something to assist ourselves with house chores wanting to impose my point of view before hearing her, so I accept and allow within myself distractions to not consider what she is sharing with me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within arrogance towards my mother; participating in back-chats and thoughts against her.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel I am better than others, so I use also distractions as a way of no hearing others as one and equal to me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing in myself arrogance towards others as myself participating in distractions to be better than others in my mind.


Ok, this point of 'arrogance' was going to be another point in another day but here it is another shadow of myself, due to my Insecurities and fears of myself.
And yes, I didn´t wanted to realize and also see this point clear - my SF assisted me to 'give it light' and so, I could see it better and so be more easy to explain it and correct it.


I see myself saying in my mind ¡¡yes, yes, yes!! with this arrogant face ( lol ) and I participate a lot in this mind-mannerism...If I can call it that way...because I don´t usually do it physically, I better do it in my mind and 'pretending' I am listening and caring...haha..wow! yes, there I am ... lol.


Well...I am continuing with this .. here...hey, my mind was expecting to say tomorrow...No! Today ! ;)


Ok!
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to pretend I care and I listen to others when In fact I am participating in my secret mind in back-chats and in thoughts criticizing them in my mind and saying to myself 'don´t hear him/her' -I am right! and I´ll do it my way.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe and thing I know more than others.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in my secret mind when I am talking with other people as a way/mechanism of defence; protecting me from others in the mind, because if something gets wrong I can protect myself and feel I was right.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in mind-mechanisms of defence instead of being here and Hear/here others as myself.


I forgive myself that I haven´t accepted and allowed myself to realize this is a way where I place myself as a person who needs to fit in and to be accepted by something outside of myself.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within Nastiness.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to pretend I am something else from what I am in my mind.
I forgive myself that I haven´t accepted myself to realize that If Lie to others in fact I am lying to myself - is not about others is about me/what makes me.


When and as I see myself participating in distractions as a way to divert myself from myself and within others. I stop and I breathe. I place myself here as One and equal to the person that is infront of me talking to me or the information that I am reading, or the situation I am experiencing ( not living cause is notorious I am not living it ) I bring myself here whenever I see myself going in to my mind to hide and to abdicate responsability - the Responsability of Being Here as One and equal to myself and One and equal to others as myself.
I place myself here, I walk here, I move myself here. Embracing all that is here within myself and making all that me.
I am attention here as self, as breath; as the breath in every moment.


When and as I see myself participating in my secret-mind in back-chats and thoughts, so placing myself more than in my mind so I block myself and I distract myself so that I can protect me; using distraction as a way to place myself above others  I stop, I place myself here, I breathe and I place myself one and equal to others as myself. I hear them, I accept others as myself and i stop arrogance and nastiness within myself.
I Make sure that all participation here is and leads to do what is best for all in all ways!!








*Note for me : ( next point - being 'nice' to hide my secret mind ) 

Day 8 - Rushing in my Mind - Rushing in my Reality

Another pattern and behaviour I am creating within me and my Reality is Rushing; running within myself, and the physical consequences I have is that my nose starts constipating and my body tightens.

I have been grounding myself with the breath and while I knit I place within myself all that Energy movements to Embrace them and to Stop them with the Breath, This have been more, while I practice it, more 'easy' to do and to Correct myself.

I have manifested that Rush in my Reality; when I see my things, my room, my house - I think -- ¡oh no I have to this! I am delayed. I worry and I start fearing the consequences; anticipating in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am a thought.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that thoughts is who I am.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am my patterns and behaviours and that I can´t stop them and change them.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that who I am is behaviours and patterns; also personalities; and that makes me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rush.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to run within myself to complete and to reach the image I have in my mind.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed in myself imaginary images of other people and experiences rushing me/making me run.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to follow images, words, pictures in my mind to influence my reality and what I really am.
I forgive myself that I haven´t accepted and allowed myself to stop rushing myself and to realize anyone and anything outside me is here doing what I am imagining. So I stop here, I breathe, I clear myself and I move myself in the physical to complete the things I have to do within Simplicity.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am energy.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I need Energy to move myself.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that Energy exists.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that rush is linked to do things correctly.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if i don´t rush myself as others, as I have seen in the example of others that means I am not moving myself and being Responsible.

I have this image/memory in my mind of --principally the one that pop-up is a job-partner I had rushing me to go to make something quickly; he talked and moved as he were running/rushing and I was calmed and I began to walk but he was like 'Move yourself quickly'!! I saw the scenario and I saw I had 'time' to do it and that i didn´t had to rush to complete it, so said to him 'Calm everything is ok, I´ll go! I do it and done, anything happened.

Another memory is from my mom when she tells me to do something and she began rushing me; I am very calmed in my movements...or I was...LOL...but she gets very mad when people don´t move quickly and starts to get very nervous. She tells to me that I don´t move myself quickly and things has to be done quickly,--Ok! I get it, but depends in which circumstances right? lol..well, I feel like if I don´t rush as them - getting energetically crazy - I am not doing the things correctly.
Various people had reacted with my patience to to things - is funny how I have this personality of being impatience...LOL..is because I rush myself within my mind--and that is because I want to please others, not taking in consideration myself first.
And I go into my mind rushing myself thinking, believing that others will get mad at me if I don´t run..LOL..

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I have to change to please others.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place me as after others instead of being equal and one with me and so with others.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect rushing and running as a way to please other people, so when I am here calmed I perceive I am not doing anything worthily.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe and think that being calmed and breathing is a waste of time.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if others see me working I am worthy and doing things correctly.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rush to demonstrate to others that I am doing Something.

This doesn´t mean that I am going to 'relax' and to sit and do nothing. No! hehe but I will walk Breath by Breath to get things that has to be done in the moment - without rushing me, as that means an abuse and stopping beliefs and perceptions to please others and having in my mind the image of others.


When and as I see myself Rushing and running within myself to reach  the image that I see in myself where I contemplate others rushing. I stop, I breathe, I Clear myself and being attentive to my breath I walk one and equal with the activity I am doing, Until it is done. Here.

When and as I see myself rushing myself and starting to participate within my mind in perceptions and ideas. I stop, I breathe. I stop what I am doing for a moment to ground myself here and to Stand from that Energy-movement and I clear myself here as One and equal to the activity i am doing, without images, beliefs, pictures, memories of the past, present and also future. Stopping Anticipation and Grounding me here with Breath. Walking here as breath,
I walk here as breath.
I am breath
I am self-Movement.





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Desteni I process - to Free yourself.