viernes, 25 de mayo de 2012

Day # 28 -- My Relation with Food

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize, see and understand that my relation with food has nothing to do with nurturing my physical body, but in 'nurturing/supporting/feeding the Mind Consciousness systems within me.


I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that I eat to feed my emotions and feelings, so producing more energy for the MCS and not to nurture and support my physical body with all the required nutriments needed.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eat when I feel bored. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go down to the kitchen to eat whatever I found on the refrigerator just to satisfy my emotions such as being boring and connecting the food with being busy - not realizing I was just feeding my mind as energy and not considering my physical body in any way.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to find in food a way to satisfy my desires and to stop my anxiousness. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect food with a feeling of satisfaction of desire, and to find the flavours so intoxicating that I feel the desire to have more; just to satisfy my wants and the needs of perpetuating that flavour in my mouth more time, thus in all these not considering the abuse I am doing to my physical body that has been fed with systems instead of support, nutrients for it efficient developement and not only talking about my arms, belly, legs, but my brain and every cell  and molecule within my body that had not had any support through all this years, yet I have been just feeding my energy constructs - the Mind Consciousness systems - 'working for them only without being aware of that cause the mind directed me through lies and tramps, not realizing that the food within which I feel more attracted to are the one that abuses me; but not because the food in fact is 'bad' is my relation, how I define myself with that food that is causing abuse.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define food as healthy and unhealthy and not realizing that I am responsable for the way I define and connect myself with the food - I use the food to divert my attention, to cover up myself, to avoid facing me and stand up as self-nurture and self-direction to support my body as myself and providing it with food that is required for it to function.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself with my Physical body, perceiving it and talking about it like if it was a separate being within my life.  


I forgive myself that I haven´t accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that I am my physical body and my physical body is me.


I forgive myself that I haven´t accepted and allowed myself to consider all parts of my physical body in equality and oneness; just worrying about certain parts of my body/physical as for example my arms, my belly, my legs and not other parts like my brain, my cells, my eyes, the molecules; other beings and life forms that are here within my body.


I forgive myself that I haven´t accepted and allowed myself to consider all my physical body as one and equal to me, and me not being  the Directive Principal to nurture to consider what is entering to my organism; questioning which is my starting point of eating.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel attracted to certain kinds of  food without taking in consideration the physical reality just my need and desires.


I commit myself to be here, in equality and oneness, questioning everything that entering to my organism; investigating the Starting point - if it is to fulfil my desires and wants; eat as energy, as systems or as the physical.


Food is here as a support for my Physical body not for feeding my MCS - emotions, feelings, thoughts.


I commit myself to investigate and to re-define food and support my physical body as one and equal to me.







miércoles, 23 de mayo de 2012

Day 27 -- A Menace called Brandy

I had a dream yesterday - it was 2 dreams in one lol.  One of them was like about Desteni I guess,  it was very diffuse. 


The other one was with my one my dogs: Brandy and how I killed her cause I didn´t wanted her to be one of us. I removed her head and I throw the body like I throw the garbage out there of my  house and we felt so 'calmed' with out her and then, I felt remorse, sadness and repentance - I became aware of me in the bed and also of my room and the bathroom - within my room - which is the place where Brandy sleeps and I felt a great relief that she was alive and it was just a dream.


When I get her out I saw her with another eyes ... I´ll explain .... Brandy has a big, healthy and crazy expression - if I can call it that way -and we get, my mom and me, very desperate when we are around her cause she is very childish and playful ; she doesn´t measure her strength and is very difficult to manage her.


So, in various occasions I participate in the desire of not having her and my mom also asks her why she opened the door that night. A neighbour rescued her and knocked on our door waiting for us to keep her, and we didn´t said no., but is was rare that we open the door in that hour, cause my mom doesn´t attends visits in the night. LOL. So this was like 'special' she moved to open automatically without thinking....


I feel bad cause is not her problem; is ours, cause I haven´t been directive towards her in controlling and stopping my feelings and emotions and I have defined her as a burden and I get very angry by his plays - she knows how to make me mad...lol...


So, the dream was an indicative that I had to work with her and my other pets. I don´t want her to abuse her and I know she perceives a certain separation cause I get very anxious cause she is so big and strong that with a hug I can broke hahaha. But she is a great assistance for me! and I do care about her.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive my dog Brandy as a menace and to have her as a trigger point within myself, that triggers emotions and feelings such as impatience, anger, desperation and rude manners.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within desperation when I am around her and I have desired to keep her away from me - giving her in adoption/getting rid of her cause I don´t bare her expression cause she is very dumb and strong. Within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive and define Brandy as dumb and as a burden within my life, imagining my life without her more easy and calmed.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fight against her without realizing my spite and the pattern of placing me as more than her/as superior with an animal that is not like a human; that is not able to behave as a human, doing things for bothering me. She is a Life Expression, She is here, She is. 


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try to play within a power struggle with a being that is not limited by MCS as Humans - and she doesn´t understand my behaviours and patterns towards her, she express the way they are without thinking, without measuring any act - and with me getting rude and impatience I don´t gain anything and I am not realizing also, is not about her is about me - So she´s an Assistance for me to Face those systems and Stand up from them.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to repent adopting her and participating in wants and desires to get rid of her as a the way I want and desire to get rid of facing myself and taking Responsability for my own actions; instead of facing them, standing here, without wanting to hide and run away from what gets wrong/what´s is threatening my life.


I forgive myself that I haven´t accepted and realize that I wanted to get rid of her cause, yes, she is a 'menace' for me as a System to take Direction and Face the points I need to work within myself so, that´s why she is here cause she is assisting me in observing patterns and behaviours within myself that requires action, Self-forgiveness and Self-Honesty.




I commit myself to work with her in this points and Accept the assistance she is giving me and continue working within writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective action to equalize me as the Life that Brandy Represents and that is here for me to accept and walk.


I commit myself to accept the assistance Brandy is giving me to flow, to release myself as self-enjoyment, to laugh about myself, to relax, to let go that 






lunes, 21 de mayo de 2012

Day # 26 -- " Another opportunity to change"

I have been searching for a job within this days - standing as the decision to do enter to a job and let my crafts for another time, or as a hobby - I have been enjoying this stage within my life and well, life presents other as doors of opportunity to flow and have more assistance and support for and within my reality.
So, I had a good job offer and I started to participate in a lot of emotions and feelings around this; I felt shocked cause I didn´t submitted any CV in the last days  - I was going to start moving that arenas LOL and puff something emerged, just as the last one when I released all the stress and worries and the opportunity arise. 


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in a feeling of excitement and surprise by getting the offer by phone; hearing all the information within emotions and feelings that made me also distract and forget about past-information of my last job, name and e-mail and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get nervous and ashamed by following back-chats saying that I show a lot of emotion when I heard the salary I was going to earn, feeling materialistic instead of facing this in calm and without any energetical movement inside me.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in desires, wants and needs to fulfil my dreams due to this opportunity, accessing my I as consciousness ( seeing with the eyes of consciousness ) anticipating to the future, , accessing to the past and participating in the present as systems. 


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel the desire and want to scream imagining myself already working there and earning that salary so I can help my mom and support house expenses, participating in imaginations and perceptions about the future.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the Fear of loss system; wanting to make sure at all cost that I was going to get that job  - going from positivity, then negativity and between that, neutrality - then again feeling fear, and sadness if the result is not what I am expecting.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to waste a lot of energy within this and believing that I could do it to really believe it was happening and also allowing back-chats of " I´ll participate in this only today and then I´ll continue directing, this warrants it", so accepting and allowing abuse and not responsability in directing myself to not feed the systems in me and so all the systems within the world.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be frenetic by going to my closet and not seeing something formal to wear for my interview and so, going into energetical movements as anxiousness, nervousness and anger cause when I am not prepared is when I get this calls or opportunities in short notice.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to support the idea and the belief that when I am not prepared I get notices as these one and I don´t have time to calm myself to study the scenarios, possibilities and so being ready; thus I forgive myself that I haven´t realized that I am defining myself as worry, as anxiousness and by time, and ideas and beliefs of needing to be something I am not in this moment. Instead of realizing I am here in every moment and I don´t need preparation or to study anything if I am here as simplicity without any desire, want or need - just me here, constant and in peace moving  myself in the physical as that simple movement of walking, directing myself, communicating and else - within simplicity and no need of systems/energy.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire being someone else; having another type of body, having another way to produce/design myself  as better than me; like changing the way I am as a product I am going to sale for other to buy and within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define me as a product that is being exchanged by money/reward so, minimizing myself; instead of being proud of myself, be calmed, directive, and stand as Self-Confidence in every breath.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to separate myself within and with this situation instead of being here, clear and embracing everything as me, directing myself to walk as Simplicity and stop systems that instead of supporting me are abusing me as also others at the same time.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into back-chats of not wanting   in fact to get a job because I will miss my free-time. 


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect job with boredom and negativity.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect sharing this in this moment - before knowing all the information - with fears and negativity, believing that If I share it before I have things done or having things I will not get it, or someone will send me bad-vibes and I am not going to achieve this desire thus, participating in spite, fear of loss and stupidity feeding beliefs and ideas that are pre-programmed and are not real. 


I Stop this. I breathe. I direct myself here. 
When and as I see myself following this behaviours and patterns I stop, I clear myself , I breath and I follow participating in my physical reality. I stop fear of loosing this opportunity.


I bring my participation here, stopping all desires, wants and needs - separation between me and all that is here to support me - and I Stand as Self-Direction, Self-responsability and Simplicity.


I breathe as I walk within my physical reality, as I communicate with others, I am constant within my breath.












jueves, 17 de mayo de 2012

Day # 25 -- Abuse towards Animals

I have had a lot of reactions and inner-conflicts in relation to animals - dogs and cats - within the world. 
Being in contact with Capuccina, the dog we are supporting had made me trigger thoughts, emotions, feelings against the current state of the world for them. Observing their puppies; entering into this world without knowing what is going to happen in the future. They are so nice and we have accepted many beings to come and come into this reality and we are not being aware of the abuse we are creating.


Also, I go out to walk Brandy and I found another dog; she had wounds in their back legs and in  her neck - I felt so powerless  - I felt angry because I cannot act in the moment and take her to the vet, to my house and assist her in what she needs.


And while I see them in those scenarios and situations - I can´t stop feeling I am not doing enough and that I have created that for them also..by all these, in fact - by participating in all these Energy reactions...systems.


I have moved myself to stop but it still a residual stuff there that continues moving in a less scale - or in a big one; Who knows? All I can do is follow supporting myself to stop this in me and so, in others.


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I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to see Capuccina and her puppies and feel sadness and worry about them for what they can live in their future and going into my mind to imagine and see/review with my "mind-eyes" - with the Eye of my conciousness - all the puppies, dogs, animals, nature that has to go through many problems and difficulties within their experiences within this existence. I realize the dishonesty and the abuse in these; supporting everything else that what is best for all -- because I am participating in my mind and Instead of bringing my participation back here - into the physical - grounding my feet on the ground and observing that nothing of that is happening here - but is happening in the mind and is the cause for the consequences we are living and is that participation that cause abuse and separation - due to that "separation" I accept and allow in my mind.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see Capuccina and her puppies, and also my cats and dogs and inmediately feel and imagine situations and scenarios and having them as a trigger point in my mind to participate in emotions as sadness and worry and feelings as happiness and all these creates energy that is the cause to create abuse and separation out there and within myself.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive animals as defenseless, I realize is something within me- is about me. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive me as defenseless and due to that perception and idea that I have defined myself as I tend to perceive others as that without knowing the real-truth within situations, beings etc and so, I create abuse and separation.


I forgive myself that I haven´t realized that in defining people, animals, the entire existence ( the beings) according to my fears, thoughts, emotions, feelings, images, ideas, beliefs I am feeding separation and abuse. 


So that´s why I realize/accept/allow the premise that everything in this Creation is about me and I have to first support and assist myself to solve and to assist the reality out-of myself.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel angry at an imaginary being that I think that harmed the dog I saw on the street with the wounds and creating/participating in back-chats in my head against someone or something that made this - instead of realizing that I am responsible by the simple fact of participating in my MCS and so in the system that allows this to happen - So I am the one that has to Stand and to make a change within every moment of every Breath.


When and as I see myself participating in those systems of abuse - seeing Capu, all the animals I have contact with with my physical eyes, stopping all participation within my mind - So I stop all systems, I breathe and I bring my participation here.


I realize I am not powerless within the action of Stopping my mind and assisting and supporting what is best for all life within having Self-direction to stop that energy I create within myself and not allow that to be 'loose in the existence' to harm others as myself.


I commit myself to Stand within this - To Take Self.direction and self-responsability to correct myself in my patterns and behaviours and to improve myself to be efficient and to make a change within myself first and as a consequence be the change out there.







lunes, 14 de mayo de 2012

Day # 24 --- I want to get what I want ; art, dreams and evil

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be defined by being an artist and to feel good by that definition as I feel different from the rest by having special gifts/equipment to  do a certain craft, drawing, photo and within this doing a separation between the people that haven´t that special skills and the people that had it  - perceiving  people that didn´t had that special skills as not so profound and sensitive as the ones that had the ability to draw, to craft etc.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel attracted to art; drawings, photographies, designs, musicians; making this section of life as more interesting, profound and cool; thinking that the people that were artists had a more interesting life and even if they didn´t had a lot of Money as people working in offices they seemed very care-free and with that sense of glamour in them.
In this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in a desire of wanting to be like them; being an artist as a painter, photographer, designer, crafter and having that sense of 'carefreeness' and glamour and walking within my life as that carefreeness, although I didn´t had enough money in my pockets, and at the same way wanting to have  a lot of Money such as the actors/actresses in the movie industry.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowing myself to connect art-world with carefreeness and a sense of glamour, participating in a desire of wanting to construct that within my life, no matter what; no matter the ideas, beliefs, and also support from others; i wanted to have the image of my mind in my reality.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire having a life where I can be my own boss; not receiving orders from others as the way I perceived the artists had their lives - carefree and doing what they wanted.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to disregard other things in my life because I wanted to live that feelings, emotions, thoughts, experiences, pictures in my head, and also sounds - not realizing those are egos from the mind; not considering what was here as me for just following a picture/image in my head and the starting point of doing what I wanted and not what others wanted me to do.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel angry at the world, the existence, god, my mother, my family for not providing me with the opportunities to have what I wanted and to be as the ones I saw within my life as family or friends as carefree doing what they wanted to do and not having to work like I have to.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be stubborn in wanting to have what my mind dictates me and fighting against all to have it although I abuse and not consider all as what is  here in my reality; so  I forgive myself that I haven´t realized the reality I have due to living in reaching a dream I have in my mind and so being blinded by all that is here that requires my support and assistance.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fight against what is real due to being directed by the desire of doing whatever is required to have what I want in my life; even if I  have to walk over others to have it
In this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be inconsiderate/egocentric - centring and focusing only in myself as my mind, wanting only to satisfy my own mind-bubbles, sucking energy from others to get what I want.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abuse others to get what I want - using manipulation, nice words and promises I will never accomplish and later use those 'steps to escalate' to the position I want within my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe the art world was the best election to construct my life as the way I wanted - cause I saw artist doing the things they wanted and so taking advantage of my creativity and art abilities  to reach to that point.





I realize that the expression I have  I use it as a way to get Money, recognition so, Energy for feeding my mind.
I realize and observe that I am abusing the expression of life to feed energy constructs instead of doing them to assist and support life.  Expressing  myself as the Starting Point of Self as Life and not as the Starting point of getting what I want as Energy.


I stop being Directed by my dreams and due to that not considering others as one as equal to me. I observe and consider others as myself and I commit myself to investigate more further this true-being I was creating/accepting within myself - a dictator. 


I commit myself to uncover and stop this evil within me to Bring myself back here as Life as a being that Considers and cares for others and me as One and Equal as Life and to stand as self-Humble and Self-Honesty to stop myself as a transgressor within life; using others to get what I want until I stand as clarity, humbleness, real service and real acceptance/ love for me and others.




.....................................................................


I started this blog as a way to talk and expose about the relation of me and art and I ended up with discovering another layer in me that is how I have abused others to get what I want- facing me as someone that doesn´t cares and consider others in fact. The true nature of my Starting Point was to get what I wanted.


This will continue and I´ll use my star-sign -  Capricorn - as an assistance.






Journey of Life in Facebook


viernes, 11 de mayo de 2012

Day # 23 -- More Resistances

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel resistance to do the Self-forgiveness today.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within feelings and thoughts and thus, feeding my resistance of moving and directing myself,  allowing and accepting self-sabotage.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within cycles and polarities within myself, being directed by energy and mood changes and let the systems direct me.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let the systems direct me today cause I didn´t wanted  and I didn´t feel adequate to direct myself and to stop the systems within me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be defined by my wants and desires; accepting and allowing back-doors within the process and being one and equal to my Mind C. systems.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to condition myself to direct myself in the physical, participating in energy as polarities within me; feeling good/feeling bad.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to condition myself in doing something is assisting me to improve myself.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe in polarities and energy changes and be conditioned by the systems, instead of bringing my participation here as the physical and stop self-abuse and self-dishonesties.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up in my process of being the Directive Principle within myself and my reality because today I felt inadequate and thinking I need it a rest; without realizing within my statement that I am still 'thinking this process' instead of living it as myself; as something that is part of myself as the breath, as my physical body and reality.


I forgive myself that I haven´t accepted and allowed myself to realize this process is a part of me; is not about others, is not of others - this is Me. I am the Process of Being my Directive Principle, being aware and improving myself to stand as Self-commitment, Self- Discipline, Self-Responsability and doing what is best for all.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel heaviness - to believe in heaviness - to accept and allow within myself heaviness. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define as heaviness and let the systems direct me, instead of directing me in every moment of every breath.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed self-sabotage within myself - give my power away to the systems - only for today - because I felt heavy, inadequate and tired - feeling like I am fighting against something Is bigger than me.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive/feel/believe this  process is a fight against myself and I have to be in constant control and 'on guard'  - not realizing I am still walking within Energy constructs and not Living  and walking this process as myself - as simple as within every breath I take.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in thoughts as back-chats to sabotage myself and giving up- although is only one day: I am allowing and accepting 'back-doors' and middle roads' and so self-abuse and self-dishonesties.




I stop defining myself and being equal and one to Mind systems such as energy; and accept Self-sabotage within my process.
Also I stop believing that Heaviness exists within me. I stop giving my power away to systems that are not real - I create them cause I participate in them and I am Responsable for those creations; and thus I stop creating abuse within myself, back-doors to sabotage my journey to life.


I Breathe, I clear myself whenever I see myself participating in those thoughts, feelings and emotions. I  stand and I bring my participation here, to my physical body and physical reality.


I no longer accept and allow excuses and justifications to Stand and to face myself in every breath.






miércoles, 9 de mayo de 2012

Day # 22 --- Energy; a Resource to Fill my Life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as emotionally unstable; thinking and believing that my mood changes is who I am and I can´t change them and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in trying  to control this instability not realizing that I was going into a battle within myself in controlling and suppressing my egos and creating more friction and conflict within myself.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create conflict and friction within myself by controlling my egos as a way of suppressing them and not facing them, also feeling ashamed and so, constantly and continuously creating instability and energetic changes as positive and negative.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel good by being different and participating within a sensation of satisfaction of not being as others and due to this believing, thinking joined with a feeling/sensation of being important or being complete.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect completeness with a sensation/feeling of being important, different, full; accepting and allowing my disorder as a way of being different from the rest; so, feeling cool by having a tag defining me as this or that.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the thought  that everybody is crazy and at least I had an original definition thus, accepting and allowing the abuse and the lies within the system that is defining everyone based on knowledge and information, disregarding me and others as myself; not being honest, being humble to accept and allow my responsability - as acceptances and allowances - in participating in this society ruled and directed by the mind.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect a disorder, an illness, a defect within myself - mentally and/or physically with something cool/original; a sensation of importance or feeling different from the rest. I forgive myself that I haven´t accepted and allowed myself to realize the animosity in this beliefs, and realizing I am also feeding the abuse I don´t want to see in my world and my reality.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to say I care when In fact I don´t and I am the same abuser as the ones I reject and I fear. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be one and equal with the abuser, the killer, the harm inflictor, the dictator. 


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed in myself separation and abuse due to participating in these ideas, beliefs, thoughts and not observing I am feeding the same source of evil and not observing  the abuse and dishonesty I was inflicting to myself.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within a Dictator character; feeling a sensation of satisfaction when I feel pain, emptiness, depression, thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself in observing pain as a protection, finding pain as a way of calm.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be radical within my relationships; jumping from black to white, playing within the polarities of negative and positive depending on the way I wanted to feel and judge others in my world and defining everything in my world as negative or positive without any other definitions and without flexibility as common sense and humility to observe my participation and responsability within that.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to idealize and devaluate people within my world.  Within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to idealize me based on the rules marked by the system and devaluate myself depending on my mood changes and depending on the words of others, situations within my life, images, thoughts, emotions.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be dependant on the movement of the energy as moods within me; thus being directed by my Mind C. Systems instead of being my directive Principle within my world and my reality.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be directed by the mind-chats and treating others and myself depending on the information that I was receiving in my mind.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to move as energy - unstable and rampant - to be one and equal with this energy fluctuations emerging from my mind.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in instability and in rampant reactions; and to  define this energy as a nice sensation within me.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to force me to evade my reality creating an inner battle; in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make a great effort in being me and in participating in my life; waiting for the end of the day to fall asleep.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel empty within myself and I used energy to feel complete and alive. 
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define and be one and equal with the Mind C. Systems and to find in energy a way to fulfil my life.




I stop defining myself  as instability. I stop participating in feelings, emotions and thoughts to find a reason to be Who I am as Life. 
I stop searching for things as Energy - emotions, feelings, thoughts - to complete my Life. My Life is complete. Life has not fails, and spaces to cover.
I stop being dependant on energy, on others, on experiences, situations, to feel complete.


I realize Life has no Reason; is an Expression, is a Constant Physical Movement. My Only participation is Here as the physical, as my physical body.  I realize and see my participation within the abuse occurring out there to other people due to not taking Self-Responsability and stopping this within me. I am one and Equal Responsible of the harm inflicted to others because I inflict that same pain in myself due to participating in separation.


So, I bring my participation back here and I breathe, I stop all that here as me to stop allowing and accepting these occurring inside me and out there.
I clear myself and I Stand - ( Stand and don´t sin anymore; as Jesus said ( lol, that words popped in my mind ...hehe ) I walk. I Correct myself now and then - since here - in every breath; accepting and realizing my  mind is not more than me, and is not less than me; we are equals --> I Step Forth and  I take the Direction here as breath, and I Commit myself to be the directive Principle of my life. I direct myself in every Breath. 
Who I am is the Directive Principle of my life accepting me and others as me as Equals and I commit to assist me to assist others also.


I accept Completeness as Life.
I am Self-Acceptance
I am Constant
I am self-constant
I am equal and one with Life
I am Life




















lunes, 7 de mayo de 2012

Day # 21 --- I hate Being Myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate who I am.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in hate against me.
I forgive myself that I  have accepted and allowed myself to create abuse within myself and towards myself feeling hate.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to prefer mostly of the time being someone else and to pretend in my mind I am something different to bear a little bit with  who I am


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to dislike the way I am, the way I am designed, the way I look, the way I talk, the way I walk, the way I smell, the way I participate within my life, the way I do things - hating everything I am.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive me as a failure because when I see myself I don´t see anything cool, nice, or extra-ordinary; thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept me with conditions, with definitions I believe as better than who I am as life and to place a veil infront my eyes to stop from facing myself as life and accept me in every breath.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look in others, values and behaviours I will want to have; as for example, Discipline, Responsability, commitment and feeling I don´t have that facility in me to improve as those words.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect Discipline, Responsability and Commitment  to a feeling of not being able to and feeling those words more than me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect discipline, responsability, commitment to fear of not being able to be one and equal to them.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear myself; to fear the way I am going to act and be in a certain situation.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and feel I don´t really know me at all; that´s why I have fear towards me and that´s why I prefer being alone or not making any promise and thus feeling I help more being away or apart from others, than being close.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear participating in things and with people because I fear I won´t be worthy; disciplined, committed, responsible as them.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in fears and to connect the word promise with fears


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in changes within my mood and to think my mood is what I am; to be defined by my mood changes.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe in my feelings and emotions and to participate in polarities, cycles and in fluctuations based on energy.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe in my emotions and feelings; feeling them so real that I feel I can´t stop them or direct me efficiently as others do, so that´s why I think and feel I wanna be someone else.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in insecurity and in fears towards myself and the way I would react in a certain situation.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in comparison and so compare myself to others in my world and participating in a desire to be as them and to participate in imaginations as illusions seeing myself as them thinking how different I would be if I were like the other people I know.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to avoid compromises as I feel and think I am not going to be able to complete and to be the what others want.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel a desire to be as the other people think about me; not realizing in fact that I don´t know what other really think and want, but making assumptions in my mind about what others may think and would think about me if I don´t do something or if I do something.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to force me to be as the image I have in my mind as the one I will and would have been; thus disregarding me in every act, in every movement I do.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to constantly being invalidating me, participating in fears and in bringing back my past; thinking that if I didn´t did something as I defined as good I am not going to do it correct again; so I desist in trying; thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive me as a failure, to feel I am not able, and within that placing myself below others and so, participating in energy as polarities, mood changes and insecurities.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe in my thoughts and to impose them in my reality.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I have no character.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in instability within myself.










I stop participating in hate towards myself. I stop my pattern of participating in feelings of invalidation towards myself. I stop insecurities and feelings I can't be and stand as Commitment, Responsability and discipline.
I stop participating  and feeding the image I have in my mind about myself. I let go that Image that is limiting me. I let go limitations, I let go control and fears.




When and as I see myself participating or equalizing myself in the pattern of perceiving myself as a burden I stop, I breathe, I clear myself . I bring my participation to my physical reality and to my physical body and I embrace me as all I am here as Life. I touch myself, I face myself and I accept and allow myself to BrEathe.


When and as I see myself thinking and feeling I want to be someone else and to change who I am I stop, I breathe, I bring myself back here and I face myself. I realize I am in fact in the  process of change but not as a way of abusing myself or as eliminating my self but as a way to assist and support me to enhance values and principles I have and to live more as myself to do what is best for all as life and I accept this is a process and I direct myself to stop falling and If I fall I will learn from that fall to keep myself standing more and more until I have no other movement as energy within myself; the only movement is  the physical movement and I move myself to stand as what is best for all.


I commit myself to walk as Self-Responsability, self Commitment and self-Discipline.
I commit myself to improve myself breath by breath and stop judgements and comparisons that are like rocks in my way and that´s why I fall.


I commit myself to assist others as myself without the limitations I place upon me as fears and thoughts.


I am Here
I am Self-Acceptance


I give so I may Receive


I face my Reality as myself.









domingo, 6 de mayo de 2012

Day 20 --- Curiosity, happiness and illusion

I am in contact with a dog that we 'rescued' which is pregnant and I have never been involved with pregnancy in my pets.  
I have participated in happiness and illusion due to this situation, imagining her having her babies; imagining possibilities and realities due to the participation in my mind.
Thus, I observe me participating in curiosity.


Yesterday, when we took her to the vet I asked A. if the babies were fine and if they was the possibility of being dead because she has delayed based on our mathematical counts when we noticed she was going to have babies.
I observe a thought coming of imagining - due to curiosity - her having her babies dead and saying: 'What if?'. I stopped. I had observed that thought in other ocassions; like the evil of myself saying yes, let´s imagine or let´s attract that image to happen to see - for curiosity - to what leads - I flagged that point.


And in relation to happiness and illusion - I felt a lot of that energy creating within myself - wanting - again, only for curiosity and so, to feed my own self-interest experiencing that event I always wanted to have in my life.


When I rescued my kittens Mishka and Kevin I also wanted them to get pregnant before I had to take them to sterilize; but I stopped that selfishness within me cause I realized what I was accepting and allowing - abuse by following my mind.


As it shows in the big-scale: due to curiosity we have done things to abuse life following the 'animosity of the mind'; pushing forward just to see the results although we know the consequence of everything we do; we want to see the limits of every being and situation in this world.


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I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in curiosity within my life to see how far I or my reality can get based in my self-interest, desires and needs.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, due participating in my mind as imagination, move myself based on curiosity.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deliberate abuse myself and others as myself just to see what happens; disregarding and not having consideration about anything in my reality, just giving importance and placing my mind-realms above life.


I forgive myself that I  have accepted and allowed myself to participate in malice - imagining malicious scenarios for others to play for me to feed my curiosity as the thought just to 'see what happens'.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be moved by my curiosity instead of being moved physically to find solutions and to act upon what is best for all life.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use myself as a tool to abuse life, instead of being a physical 'tool' to assist myself and others.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within happiness and illusion towards the situation of Cappuccina - the name of the dog - having puppies; not considering her within this, but only considering myself to feed and fulfil my desires and needs.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect happiness and illusion to Cappuccina having puppies just because I haven´t experimented or being part of this event within my life.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be participate in selfishness; considering only me and that´s why I participate in polarities such as happiness, sadness, etc; they are the result of my egos - the one that are not fulfilled and the ones that are fulfilled, thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to consider only me within my reality; creating in my mind scenarios and attracting things just to feed my egos.


I forgive myself that I  have accepted and allowed myself to impose over others my own wants and desires without considering others and not having Humility to realize and Stop.




I stop the Curiosity within myself and I bring my participation here as the Physical.


I Move myself in the Physical to stop participating in my mind and thus being one and equal with my Mind C. systems; abusing life and just wasting my time and breaths in places where I cannot make a change as what is best for all as Life.


I Direct My participation to the Physical Reality and In every breath I stand as one and Equal to Life. Participating in bringing Up solutions to Stand as Life in every breath. To observe myself and correct myself with the tools of self-forgiveness, Self-corrective applications, Living self-correction in my daily basis! 
Re-educating myself to be more as Life; honest, responsible, committed, dedicated; Living all the tools provided here to change myself and my reality in a Place that is best for All as Life




Cool Blog with a great SF-Assistance related to this I write
Read it:


Creations Journey to Life





jueves, 3 de mayo de 2012

DAY 19 -- Rotten Child. Being Spoiled

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have learned to manipulate my mother and my grandmother for obtaining things I wanted in the moment; using tantrums and also using promises I usually never   fulfilled.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that by using tantrums and nice words, participating in a nice personality and promising things to my mother and my grandmother I will get what I wanted from them.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make promises to my mother and my grandmother as a way to make them believe I am going to be different and change being more obedient, responsible and to  keep my things in order to have what I want in that moment and when I obtain that thing I wanted I can forget my promise.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to move myself in order to obtain a reward and to get an energetic experience named as satisfaction; thus only moving myself in order to obtain something that will satisfy my desires and needs, considering only me in the equation and being selfish with others around me.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a form to manipulate my mother and my grandmother when I wanted something; that consisted in making promises and demonstrating I would change and then forgetting all that commitment because I obtained what I wanted in that moment, so making what I promised to others before obtaining and fulfilling my desire was not important anymore.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use tantrums as a desperate remedy to obtain something when I observe things are not going in the way I want.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe and think all the things I want has to be made in the moment and to obtain that I often participate in energetic reactions within myself to make things happen - participating in the Law of attraction.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel more satisfaction in the way of fighting to get what I want than in the moment I obtain it, cause when I obtain I cease to participate in satisfaction so I have to look for another source of energy.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in manipulation to obtain things from others making promises I was not going to keep and waiting for others to forget about the point to follow my path of self-interest obtaining what I want in the moment the desire and need arises within  me.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to move myself only if I can get satisfaction and rewards such as Money and special items and if not I loose interest.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in self-interest.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to move myself only If I am going to have a reward.




I stop my self-interest: I realize I am participating in dishonesties and in the system that creates Inequality for others by being a rotten child/adult only considering me in the equation and forgetting everything else.
I stop participating in the system of being selective - not including within me others as myself